Plan F
by Goody
Summary: Complications arise during a break-in with Parker forcing Eliot to resort to Plan F. No pairings.


**Title**: Plan F  
**Rating**: PG  
**Disclaimer:** I do not own Leverage or its characters, as is obvious. If I did there would be no hiatus, just constant Leverage episodes.  
**Spoilers**: I don't think so.  
**Author's Notes**: Just a bit of break-in fun with the team. Gen, no pairings. Italics mean someone is talking over the earpieces. Hope you enjoy.  
**Summary**: Complications arise during a break-in with Parker and Eliot is forced to resort to Plan F.

The night was cool but Eliot didn't mind the light breeze on his face as he stood on the roof of the office building. What he did mind was the devilish grin on Parker's face as she finished checking over the harness wrapped around his torso.

He glared at her, feeling ridiculous in the repelling gear, "I don't even think you tried to figure out another way into this place."

"Why would I?" she shrugged, "This way works great. You'll do fine Sparky, I mean if Hardison could do it."

"_I screamed in a manly fashion_," Hardison reminded them both over the comms.

Eliot had never repelled, it wasn't his style, but that didn't mean he was about to take her patronizing tone about it.

"We all set?" he asked as she tugged on the rope one last time.

"Yep," Parker replied eagerly, ready to go.

"Good. Race ya," Eliot called out, enjoying the surprised look on Parker's face as he smirked uncharacteristically and ran for the edge. He may have never repelled before but he would be damned if he was going to let Parker think he was scared.

The air whipping past his face, gravity pulling him down and his complete lack of control during free fall was actually very liberating. He felt a brief release of the tight control he always kept on himself and closed his eyes to experience it better. All too soon the rope tightened and he was slowing. Opening his eyes seconds later he was hanging on the side of the building, Parker next to him smirking in satisfaction.

"Nice dive," she commented, pulling out the glass cutter.

"Good teacher," he retorted, giving credit where due as she had given him pointers before they jumped.

"_Glad you're both alive_," Nate added, finally joining the job. "_How's the window looking_?"

"It's fine," Parker mumbled, suddenly unhappy. "I feel very undignified breaking into a bathroom."

"_Sorry, it's the only room on the floor with a window and no motion sensors_," Hardison explained.

"Yeah, but it's the boys bathroom," Parker continued with a disgusted grimace as she finished cutting the glass. She had made a hole big enough for her hand which she reached through and then unlatched the window from the inside. Eliot pushed it open as she pulled her hand free.

"Well then, I better go in first," he offered as he pulled his legs up, released the rope latch and let himself drop into the bathroom. There was basic lighting on in the room but it was almost midnight so he was fairly certain it was going to be empty unless one of the many security guards had stopped by for some business. He heard Parker drop in behind him as he checked all the stalls and found them empty.

"We're clear," he reported to Nate.

"_Good, head right when you leave, our target's office is on the corner,"_ Nate reminded them.

"_According to the guard rotation you've got fifteen minutes before anyone should be coming by_," Hardison supplied.

"Geez, that's enough time to rob a dozen offices," Parker pointed out, mildly insulted they had so much time to work with.

"_I'll settle for just this one_," Nate said. "_Besides, we haven't been able to get any surveillance in his office we have no idea what kind of safe or security measures might be in play."_

"We know," Eliot huffed as they headed towards the door, slinging their bag of supplies over his shoulder. Parker knew her way around safes but if there was something electronic Hardison had supplied them with every interactive device available so he could hack it remotely and if there was some kind of alarm that would tip off the guards, well, that's why Eliot was there. As the two thieves walked down the hallway they were pretty confident they could handle anything. When they reached the office Parker immediately crouched in front of the door, lock pick in hand but then she yelped when Eliot grabbed her shoulder and pulled her back, covering her mouth.

"What the f…" she started to swear at him but he put a finger to his lips and indicated she should peer through the thin pane of glass next to the door. When she glanced inside the window her eyes widened.

"Who the hell is that?"

"Just what I was wondering," Eliot agreed, then touched his earpiece. "Nate, we got a problem, there's someone in the office."

"_At midnight?"_ Nate asked, surprised.

"She must be robbing him too. How dare she beat us here!" Parker exclaimed, insulted at the idea of competition beating her at something. Eliot had to tighten his grip on her shoulder when she tried to storm into the room to confront the possible thief.

"She's not robbing him Parker," Eliot said confidently as he peered into the window again. The woman was sitting at a computer, working casually in the outer office that would lead to their target's larger room behind her.

"I think it's his assistant working late," Eliot reported. There was silence from Nate for a moment – they had not planned on a workaholic assistant being in the office to screw up their plan.

"Well, go take care of her," Parker instructed Eliot impatiently when Nate said nothing.

"Take care of her?" Eliot repeated, not liking where this was going.

"That's what you're here for right?" Parker asked. "If she was a security guard in your way you would, you know, boom, pow, so, do your thing."

Eliot forced himself to breathe to control his anger, "I can't beat up a 100 pound woman Parker!"

The thief glanced through the window quickly and assured him, "I think you can take her."

"I don't hit women," Eliot gritted out, thinking he might make an exception soon, just for Parker.

"Fine," Parker sighed, rolling her eyes. "I'll do it."

This time when Parker tried to enter Eliot grabbed the petite blond in a full on bear hug and forcibly lifted her away from the door.

"Hey!" she complained.

"_All right, no one is doing anything to that woman_," Nate finally piped in, clearly having formed a new plan. "_Eliot, describe her_."

Having a feeling where this was going Eliot rattled off, "Late twenties, early thirties, pretty, working this late I doubt she's married, probably no kids."

"_Good, that's what I wanted to hear. Go to Plan F."_

Nodding his head Eliot grabbed their bag and Parker's wrist and headed back towards the bathroom.

"What's Plan F?" Parker asked, either forgetting or having never been told.

"It's a plan that doesn't involve you talking," Eliot replied, shushing her and still angry that she implied he might be willing to beat up a woman. When they got back to the bathroom Eliot threw the bag on the counter and started to rifle through it, pulling out what he needed. Parker watched in fascination for a moment before remembering what Plan F was.

"Right, Plan F. Huh, didn't expect it to be you doing it," she commented as he pulled out a dress shirt, blazer and tie from the bag. Kicking off his shoes he intended to change his pants but Parker was staring at him in a non-sexual but still creepy way.

"You mind?" he asked, intending to get her to turn around.

"Mind what?" she replied in a completely oblivious tone.

Growling Eliot picked her up for a second time and spun her around, "Don't move."

"Oh, Eliot's shy," Parker giggled to Hardison over the comms when she realized why she was now facing the wall.

"_Just cause you aren't doesn't mean we all shouldn't be_," Hardison replied, not laughing and secretly grateful for Eliot for making Parker turn around. The last thing he wanted was her checking out ripped, naked, muscley Eliot.

Eliot also didn't laugh. He wasn't shy but as he pulled off his t-shirt he caught a brief glimpse of his scarred back and chest in the bathroom mirror. There were some things the team just didn't need to know about or see.

When she heard enough clothes rustling to indicate that Eliot must be fully clothed by now Parker turned around to see Eliot buttoning up the dress shirt over a tank top. Moving over to the counter she picked up the last piece of his outfit, smiling gleefully.

"Ah, your tie's a clip-on," she pointed out, playing with it and clipping it onto her own collar. "It's so cute!"

"Give me that," he demanded, fighting the blush threatening his cheeks. Parker pouted as he took it off her and clipped it on himself then explained hastily, "They're easier to get on in a rush, which is what we are in."

"Maybe you are. I don't do anything in Plan F," Parker grumbled, crossing her arms and jumping up on the counter.

Not about to start consoling Parker because she couldn't steal anything at the moment Eliot spoke into his comm, "Hardison, can you text me the phone number for the guy's inner office?"

"_On its way_," the hacker replied almost instantly. The number popped up on Eliot's phone and he dialed it. It rang five times and went to voicemail as he had expected it to. He hung up and didn't leave a message. Turning back to the mirror one last time he pulled his hair back to seem slightly more professional and was ready to go.

"Stay here, watch for guards," Eliot instructed Parker who punched him lightly on the shoulder.

"Go get 'em slugger," she encouraged. He rolled his eyes and headed into the hallway, trying to walk around like he belonged there. When he reached the office again he took a breath, remembered he was playing a character so wasn't supposed to be sneaky and knocked on the door as he pushed it open.

The girl sitting at the desk looked up in surprise when the door opened but it quickly changed into an easy smile as she took in the sight of the hitter in a nice fitting business suit.

"Can I help you?" she asked her hand automatically going to her hair to straighten it out.

"Wow, I can't believe anyone's still here, you must be one hell of a hard worker," Eliot replied with fake surprise, and a charming smile. "I actually needed Mr. Farrar, there's no chance he's around or in contact is there? I called up a minute ago to check. There was no answer obviously but I thought I'd come up anyway."

She shook her head sadly, "No, he left hours ago. I heard the phone ring but I'm not supposed to pick it up. What did you need him for?"

Her eyes were tired but big now that Eliot was here. He smiled – she was eager to help him, this was going to be easy.

"Well, here's the thing, I've been out with a client all day and most of the night and my blackberry's broken. I came in about an hour ago to finish up a few things and found an email from Paul, he wants a draft report on the Sepracor Audited Accounts early tomorrow morning. He said he'd send the file materials down to me but I can't find them anywhere and I'm worried he didn't send them down," Eliot explained, giving her the name of the file they were actually there to steal.

The assistant nodded in exaggerated understanding, hanging on every word.

"I wouldn't be surprised if he forgot, he's like that. Sepracor?" she repeated as if remembering, "I think I remember seeing that."

"If you could point me in the right direction I would really appreciate it, if it's not too much trouble. I'm not looking forward to starting this thing at 9 o'clock tomorrow morning, you know what I mean," Eliot said before flashing her his winning smile.

"I completely understand. Give me one second, I'll check his office," she promised, standing up to check for him.

"Thanks so much darlin'," he answered, emphasizing his accent as he laid on the charm. She smiled, possibly flustered as she disappeared into the inner office.

"_Do you think you could make your accent a bit thicker or would you rather Parker just bring you some cowboy boots, a hat and a whip?"_ Hardison asked sarcastically, secretly jealous of Eliot's ease with the ladies.

"Shut up Hardison," was Eliot's simple yet elegant response.

The girl, Paula if her name plate on the desk was correct, came back quickly with a thin file in hand.

She smiled and held it up, "Got it. Looks like the documents are all originals though, I know he likes hanging on to those. You mind if I make you a photocopy?"

"_You mean, mind if I spend ten more minutes with you while I make copies and learn if you're married?"_ Hardison paraphrased for the assistant in Eliot's ear. The hitter made a mental note to yell at the hacker later and maybe break something in front of him, just as a reminder of what he was capable of.

"Uh …" Eliot started, unable to ask a question of the team but Nate filled in for him.

"_Photocopies will work fine_."

"That'd be fine, thanks," Eliot repeated quickly to cover up the pause.

"_If you'd knocked her out to start with we would have been out of here ten minutes ago,"_ Parker reminded them, bored and alone in the bathroom.

"_Then Eliot wouldn't have had a chance to flex his charm muscles though,"_ Hardison remarked. Eliot was one more comment away from breaking cover and telling everyone to shut up when Nate beat him to it.

"_Parker, Hardison, not another word until Eliot's out, then I'm sure he's going to have some words for you himself. Or maybe some actions_."

Eliot had money on actions, but had to smile and make chit-chat with Paula while she ran the documents through the photocopier and batted her eyelashes at him. After a minute of small talk about how "she works late quite a bit but doesn't mind because the _people_ here are all so great" the file was photocopied and in Eliot's hand.

"Don't you stay here too late, darlin'. Thanks again, you're a lifesaver – I'm gonna bring you a coffee myself tomorrow morning," he promised, knowing if he offered to come back she wouldn't latch on at the moment to ask for a name or phone number.

"It was no problem. Any time," she said, fixing her hair one last time as he exited the office with a short wave.

As soon as he was out the door he was charging down the hallway back to Parker's position.

"Guards?" he asked Hardison.

"_Three minutes until the next sweep_," he answered.

Pulling off his tie as he entered the bathroom he found Parker finishing up with the zip lines that would take them back out of the building.

She shook her head in disappointment when she saw him, "You're not a thief."

"Excuse me?" Eliot asked, oddly insulted.

"You didn't steal those you just asked for them, that's not stealing. It's not even borrowing without permission," Parker pointed out, very unimpressed as she passed him his harness to put back on.

"I lied and walked away with something that didn't belong to me, that's stealing," he defended himself as he handed her the files to pack away.

She took them but wasn't convinced, "You asked permission and got copies of something that didn't belong to you. If I take a picture of a Monet and then leave it in the museum I don't consider it stolen."

Eliot's temper was about to flare again and apparently Nate could sense it and butted in, "_This is an intellectual property Parker, not a physical one. Once it leaves the office it is very much stolen. If you still want to argue more do it after you get out of there."_

Eliot made a face of triumph to indicate he had won the argument and snapped his harness on with an air of finality.

"Whatever. Plan F was a roaring success then," Parker said, reporting in as they both latched their ropes back onto their harnesses.

"_Plan F_," Hardison repeated, slightly confused. "_What's up with that? I don't remember plans B through E."_

"_That's because there aren't any_," Nate replied. "_For this job there's a Plan A, F, M, S and T_."

"_Do these letters stand for something? What was Plan M where I died anyway?"_ Hardison questioned.

"_The M was for Manual. If you died Eliot was going to have to manually pull out the hard drives at Pierson Aviation instead of you downloading the information_," Nate explained.

Eliot nodded, that made sense, then asked as he and Parker zipped back to the roof, "And Plan F?"

There was an awkward silence for a moment as Nate considered his answer and then seemed to reluctantly decide to go with the truth, "_Well Eliot you just successfully completed Plan Flirt_."

Eliot was silent as Hardison laughed and Parker looked him in the eye, straight-faced, "I'm so proud."

"Shut up."

The end.

Just some team fun, hope you enjoyed. Oh and speaking as a person who works at a large law firm (as an assistant, not a lawyer) it basically is that easy to steal files sometimes, which I find pretty ridiculous, but is good news for our team. Later, Goody.


End file.
